Posted by Anonymous.
“That’s great, but you are going to have to pay for cheerleading camp on your own” was her response when I told her I made the cheerleading team.
“Why can’t you be like your sister?” was what she said when she came home from a parent teacher conference and was told that I was a “social butterfly”.
“You deserve all of the pain you are going through” was what she said when I cried after giving my daughter up for adoption when I was 16 years old.
“I guess you can't go to church tonight” was her response when I had my stomach pumped.
“Are you on drugs? What is wrong with you” was what she said to me when my ex-husband and I went through a devastating divorce.
“Your children will never experience true blessings unless you have them baptized” was how she replied when I told her my son was being bullied at school.
Why can’t I ever find the words? Why can’t I say… “Isn’t a mom supposed to love her child unconditionally? Aren’t Mom’s here to celebrate with us when we have a moment of joy, and cry with us in times of sorrow?”
How do I move on from this? How do I forgive and let go when it continues? How do I fill the awkward silences, after her words have hurt me and I can’t find the strength to respond?
I would give anything to feel her arms around me and her voice telling me that I am good enough, to hear her say that I am a good mom and a good wife.
And that she is sorry.